Just look at the face....

I know that I am not a parent of my own children but I have so many years of experience with kids that I feel like I understand the inner workings of a child and the relationship they have with parents and those in authority over them. I appreciate the child's mind and their desire to be spontaneous, adventurous and free, and, in a way, I also appreciate their strong will and desire to test the boundaries. I mean, without pushing their parent's buttons or testing the boundaries of their teachers or caregivers, they won't really know what's deemed unacceptable. To be honest, when I run across a child who doesn't push the boundaries and test the waters, I begin to wonder why. It's slightly sad to say, but disobedience is something that I expect from children. Of course, not an overabundance, but I think that there is a healthy limit.
What irritates me beyond belief is when there is testing of boundaries and buttons but no discipline. How is the child suppose to learn if there is no correction? I don't mean spanking for every little thing, and I certainly don't mean giving excessive warnings and counting to "3" eight times before taking action. There needs to be clear cut expectations of correction. A child should know that when you say no that you mean business. Give a warning, but after that first warning, take action. When I find kids who know they can wear the adult down if they do something continuously, it makes me cringe inside. I cringe because one...the parent or caretaker can't stand up for what they want to a child and two... the child is learning to view authority as a joke.
Life is not full of warnings. Most of the time, we get a slap on the wrist the first time around. These kids who are growing up thinking there aren't consequences to things or that they can get away with things are going to have a rude awakening.
I have found that when parents have multiple children, there is usually one child who is the instigator, one the follower, and one left in the dust. Often times, it's easy to mistake the one eating the dust as the instigator simply because they didn't figure out how to get out fast enough. The follower generally doesn't get blamed because they were misled. The instigator is normally sly enough to create the problem and slip away fast enough to appear innocent. It's not an easy task, but it's usually relatively easy to figure out which is which by simply looking at one's facial expressions. The instigator tends to have a smirk about them that they cant seem to shake and the one in the dust has a dumb founded look on their face simply because they're trying to figure out what the heck happened. The follower usually is showing a mixture of both faces because they're unsure of how they're going to be viewed.
Kids amaze me. Many people underestimate their perception of adults. They understand a lot more than we think, and they know how to work it to their advantage. Being with kids daily is a challenge, but it's one that I live for. Daily I learn something new from these pint sized human beings, and I am so thankful for their simple understanding of the world.

A child's facial expression tells it all!