I feel as though I haven't been able to just sit down and write. Thoughts pop into my mind, and I think about how I should write about them, but when I actually get home, time is ticking and the thoughts are gone. I miss writing. It was so relaxing to just sit and write while the kids were napping, but I no longer have those three hour time spans to think, process, and formulate.
I am now working in an environment that demands my full attention to every detail sometimes for 12 hours straight... details from how many necklaces are on a rack to how many boxes we got in to helping a customer to making sure each and every piece of clothing is in place, not to mention making sure everyone else is doing their job. It's demanding, but I love it. The part that I don't love is how mentally exhausted I am at the end of the day. I come home and just want to stare at the white walls in my apartment, and for those who know me, sitting still is not my "thing."
I want to write. I want to let the words flow and get out what's on my mind, but all that has been on my mind is when's the next floor set? and did we get that piece in yet? I sit down with ideas but those ideas don't come out.
I never realized just how much I enjoyed sharing what was on my mind. I guess it's a way that I felt connected. I don't is an outlet for me to process things, and I guess, until my life settles down into the routine of this crazy work life, I will be popping in and out. I don't consider myself a writer, but one could say that I have writer's block. I hope it will soon disappear, but until then, my posts will be rather sporadic so bear with me.

What if they were just gone?

Do you stop to think about what you are thankful for? Have you ever stopped to think about what you would do if everything you weren't thankful for was all of a sudden gone? And, I don't mean all the things in life that you dislike magically disappearing, I mean all the things that you enjoy in life but don't take time out to say thank you for them. What if the things in life that get you through your day were just no longer there? What then?
This concept of actually stopping to be thankful for things is not a new one, but maybe this will just put a different perspective to it. There are many things in my life that I would be left without. I honestly don't take time out of my day to be thankful for the sunshine that is streaming through my windows in the morning or the cool autumn breeze that stirs up the colors and smells of fall. The birds outside my window would no longer exist and my mornings would honestly be less beautiful to me. I love hearing the different song birds in the morning; they're like a natural alarm clock. I wouldn't have my car (though if you know me at all, you would know there are days when I would be more than a-okay with that). My health, my friends, my music, my apartment, the people in my life that I could not live without, and the list goes on. It's not that I'm not grateful for things, I truly am. I feel blessed to have all that I do and to be surviving on my own away from friends and family that I miss so much. But, I don't take the time out of each of my day to just be thankful.
We are so blessed to live in a world full of beauty and creativity. Have you ever stopped to just look at a weeping willow, a rose, or a blue bird? Each one took time to make and took a creative mind to imagine and then make. The beauty and imagination behind each of us should be enough to stop us in our tracks and just be thankful that time was taken to give us life.
I think it's so easy to be thankful in the good times and for the good times in our life, but what about the other time? The time where we are hurting. The time where getting out of bed is just too hard to do because we can't stand the thought of going through another horrible day. Let's not kid ourselves, being thankful during the "no good, bad days" isn't exactly number one on our thank you lists. And, if it is, I'm sure many of us would question that person's sanity.
I say all this to simply remind you all, as well as myself, to be thankful for not only the big things that we hope and pray will happen to us, but also the little things that are just present in our day but go unnoticed. Don't wait until those things are no longer there to appreciate them because then it might be too late.

Time...

There's never enough, it never goes by how you want it, and you're always left wanting more. We're all given the same amount of time in our day...24 hours. Do you ever stop and think about how you use your time? I'm sure you can rattle off things you do like get up, eat, go to work, shop, etc, but what about all the time in between?
Are there things in life that you claim you would do if you had more time? I know I do, but guess what? We aren't going to be given more time. And, to be quite honest, we don't even know how much time we truly have. Not a single one of us knows the day of our last breath. We can't plan out our whole life because we don't know how long that life will be. Sure, we can plan to get a college degree, land a great job, meet someone, get married, start a family, retire, and live happily ever after, but what person doesn't think about that? I bet every person walking this earth has a plan rather similar to that one. It's the idea that we all grow up with, and I think at times we come to view ourselves as deserving of such things.
If you can't tell, I've been thinking a lot about time. I always wish I had more, and rarely do I stop to be thankful for what I have. But, reality is I don't. I can't count on having tomorrow, just as much as I can't count on the weather report being 100% accurate. Things change, and it all boils down to the fact that we aren't running the show...I'm not running the show. There are things in life that are a mystery, and how much time we have is one of them.
I've wrote before about how it's important to cherish the time that we have because we don't know how much we have left. And, in a way, this post is similar to that. But along with the thought of time being short, i'm trying to remember to not be disappointed with the time I do have. Instead of wishing that I had another hour to chat with a friend or another day to myself, I need to simply make the most of what I do have and be thankful for it. Instead of putting off plans for when the "time" is right, I need to jump at the opportunities that life presents.

Time is a gift...

What are you going to do with yours?

What is it with kids and hiding things?

Thankfully, this is a juice sippy, but it's worse when the milk sippy goes missing. (Might I add that I detest sippy cups with a passion!) Little Man is addicted to hiding things...my shoes, my keys, my wallet, my phone, my sunglasses, his cup, his sister's cup, and the list goes on...

I swear it's to keep me on my toes.

It's Fall... I think...

Well, it's fall in my book. I live in NC which means the sun still makes its presence known in September and allows the temps to creep up to the 80s here and there. To any southerners reading this, they are probably thinking, "Um...it's September so it's fall." But, to me, a northerner at heart, still sees it as summer. My body is telling me it's still summer while my mind and heart are screaming it's fall.
I miss all that NY has to offer during the fall. The colors of the leaves as they prepare to fall off the trees that draped along the hills and mountains are breathtaking, the crisp air that is full of that earthy smell is invigorating, the idea of pumpkins and apples and spices make my mouth water, and knowing that I can wear cute jeans and sweaters that match my boots makes me a little giddy.
I have been dying to sip hot apple cider next to a fire while curled up in a blanket watching a movie. There is only one thing wrong with that scenario. I don't have a fireplace, nor do I really want a fire when it's still 80 outside! Fall doesn't seem to show its face until October around here, if we're lucky. Sure, the days get more rainy and the leaves begin to change, but there's just something different when compared to NY.

As soon as September 1st rolled around, I wanted to bake more than usual (which is a lot if you know me). 

Apple Pie

Apple Crisp

Pumpkin Pie

Molasses Cookies

Pumpkin Spice Cookies

Ginger Cookies

Mocha Chocolate Chip Cookies

Pumpkin Swirl Brownies

Baked Apples

Apple Strudel

Apple Cinnamon Cake

Berry Cobbler

Apple Dumplings

Homemade Donuts

And the list goes on...

Can you see the common thread in all these desserts? 

Apples... mmmm, I love them. Put some cinnamon in there with it, and I am on cloud nine!

There are so many other yummy foods that come to my mind when I think of fall, but to sit here and list them would only make your mouth water...even more...

Picture that just out of the oven, golden brown on top, with juices bubbling

Sighs... I love fall...

Guaranteed...

In the ever changing world of kids, I know there are things that I am guaranteed to encounter. Things like...

Dirty Diapers

   Temper Tantrums

      Spilled Milk

         Mess after Mess

            Nap Times

               Teething

                  Learning Moments

                    Potty Training

                      Squished Food (in hair)

                         Squeals and Giggles

                            Multitudes of Kisses

                              ...and did I mention tantrums?

Life has been crazy lately (hence the lack of posts). Remember when I wrote about how I felt change coming? Yeah... well, it's here. I am the process of changing jobs which means I am still nannying full time and training for the new full time position at my other job. 

Along with those changes come new developments with the munchkins. Little Man turned a year last month and decided to start walking along with that milestone. He is now very sure of his steps and is intentional in all his actions (especially the disobedient ones), and he is jabbering up a storm. Miss Magee is fully embracing the terrible twos (and by fully embracing I mean loving every minute of driving us mad). They both know how to push my buttons.

At the same time, they both have mastered melting my heart. Every smile, every giggle, every kiss, every hug, and yes...every tear, I cherish because I know that the next day will only be one step closer to me not being with them. It's been 10 months since our worlds collided, and though there have been bumps and twists and turns, there have been many smooth patches and blue skies too. 

My New Challenge

I just wanted to take a little time to explain to you why I have a St. Jude link on my page. I have been given the responsibility to lead my fellow team of sale associates at New York & Company in raising money for St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. Before this responsibility, I was aware of what St. Jude was all about (or at least I thought). I knew that my donation would help fund research, but I neglected to realize that there is so much more to it than that. I am now aware that money donated not only helps to fund research into childhood cancer but also other diseases. It also helps pay for the cost of treatment when a child's insurance won't, helps cover the cost of food, travel, and lodging for the patient and one family member, as well as helps make the stay more comfortable for the patient (like buying teddy bears or blankets). And, these are actually just a few ways our dollars help.
With this new responsibility comes a goal- to raise money between now and November 19 when the walk takes place in Raleigh.Therefore, I have a challenge- to collect as many donations and make people more aware of this great opportunity to help someone we may never meet. There are walks being held all around different states, and I would love to be able to share in this experience with you. If you feel led, you can click on the link to the right of this post and do 1 of 3 things (or all if you so choose). You can...

1. Donate through my page (credit card or contact me and donate cash or check)

2. Sign up to participate in the walk, create your own page, and raise money 

3. Become a sponsor and partner with others to help me reach my goal 

Any or all of those things will help the main goal be reached. What exactly is that goal? To raise as much money and awareness as possible to help better the lives of these children. 

If you would like, you can click here to find out other ways in which to help. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this little blurb about what I am doing. 

Aren't they so stinkin' cute?!