Circumstances or The Face of Jesus?

I was listening to the radio today, and they were talking about how today is the one year anniversary of the earthquake in Haiti. There were a couple people talking about their recent trip to Haiti, and the one guest was talking about the circumstances around the situation then and now. A phrase caught my attention: Are we focusing on the circumstances or on the face of Jesus? They kept talking about what that meant for them, but I think I tuned them out as I focused on just what that meant to me.
Circumstances... it's a nice way to summarize the crappy times in our life that we are dealing with. When things are going our way, we, at least I, tend to be more willing to divulge in just what those "circumstances" are, but when things are messy and less appealing, things are kept secret and deemed as "circumstances" or "situations."
I began to ask myself. Do I focus on the circumstance or the face of Jesus in those valleys that tend to slump my mood? Or, do I focus on the one who has brought me to this valley in order to show me just what he is capable of doing? I am so easy to see only the shadows in the valley that I neglect to see the powerful sun breaking through the gloom, shining down on me, allowing me to see a way out of the gloom and despair. I am so quick to take my focus off the face of Jesus and remain fixed on the events taking place in my life. I become so consumed by those events and the depressing connotations they can carry with them that I forget to look at the one who can redeem me from there and bring me to a better place.
Not only will he bring me to a better place mentally, but also spiritually and emotionally. I forget the powerful restorative power that the face of Jesus possesses. I'm sure the story of Peter (Matthew 14) walking on the water comes to your mind (it did mine). Peter trusted Jesus to the point of actually getting out of the boat to step out onto the raging sea that was hurling waves toward him. He had the confidence to let go of the boat and begin walking toward this man on the water. For a few seconds he was able to concentrate on the face of Jesus, but something made him doubt and look away and realize the circumstances that were surrounding him. Peter saw the waves and the anger of the sea all around him and quite possibly began to doubt that what he was doing was really possible. He panicked. The beautiful thing is that Jesus didn't just sit there and watch Peter sink in the storm. Peter also didn't just give up and give in to the dark waters; he remembered who Jesus was and called out to him, and Jesus reached down and saved him by pulling him up out of the rage that was beginning to engulf him.
I have had those moments (more often than not) when I begin to trust God with my heart and begin to take steps toward giving it all to him, but become distracted by the moments that knock me off balance and remind me of just what is going on around me. I lose sight of the only reason as to why I am where I am. I forget that I was not venturing out to do something by myself, but rather, I was being guided by the only person who orchestrates the earth and all that takes place on it. I forget that I just simply need to focus on him and his saving grace and abundant mercy and love, and instead, I focus on the raging storms that are surrounding me and crashing into me with such strength. I quickly believe that I am sinking. But, in those brief moments of fear and panic, something reminds me that the God of all this world who has allowed this mess and chaos to be a part of my journey through life is still there beside me. I remember that he has not walked away, and most importantly, he has not taken his eye off of me. I am reminded that I just need to call out to him.
He is so faithful to deliver us. Sometimes, his way of delivering us is slow and painful, but in the end, it's what was best for us and our development toward being a stronger believer in him. I have many Peter moments, unfortunately. Some last longer than others, and the pain that I put myself through can be unbearable. The path back to "normalcy" can be quite rewarding though.